Time Machine
by Kyoko Saiki
Summary: Someone from the future takes the RK-gumi onto a ride in 2002 AD... what the in world happened? R and R to find out!
1. Part I

Hi minna! This is my first attempt in parody. There are a lot of mistakes here and I haven't had anyone to beta read for me. If those who are interest, please leave your email in the reviews. Thank you! (There're 2 parts to this parody.)  
  
--  
  
Time Machine I  
  
kenshin huming as he worked with the laundry, and kaoru, as usual, drilling yahiko endlessly, with sano napping on the porch when…  
  
  
  
POOF  
  
  
  
the kenshin gumi were engulfed in smoke  
  
  
  
"What the HELL…" sano coughed.  
  
  
  
"Kaoru-dono?!" kenshin yelled.  
  
  
  
"Huh?!" yahiko whimpered.  
  
  
  
"Daijubou, kenshin!" kaoru yelped.  
  
  
  
coughing, and sputtering, the smoke soon cleared, and a weird girl sprawled on the floor was seen, sputtering and grumbling.  
  
  
  
"Kenshin!" kaoru hurried to his side.  
  
  
  
"Daijubou desu ka?" kenshin asked.  
  
  
  
"Che… of all times… when I'm having such a nice nap…"sano grumbled.  
  
  
  
"And WHO'S this weirdo here?" yahiko punctured.  
  
  
  
immediately, the girl sat up, eyes flashing dangerously.  
  
  
  
"Weirdo?! I'll get you, yahiko-CHAN!!!" the girl ran after him, pounding on his head with a strange device.  
  
  
  
"Ano… you KNOW Yahiko?" Kaoru asked behind kenshin's back.  
  
  
  
"Of course I know him. I KNOW all of you, in fact." The girl straightened up from a fainted yahiko and introduced herself.  
  
  
  
"I…" she began dramatically. "Am the time machine tester!! And I am supposed to bring back some people from the past to prove the point. And I guess I'm in the Meiji Era, eleventh year?" she checked the device in her hand.  
  
"time machine tester-dono… why are you here de gonzaru? Eto, you're here to…?!" kenshin asked, shocked.  
  
  
  
"Chikuso…never expected…. Let me see…" sano made for the device.  
  
"DON'T YOU DARE!" she yelled, and kicked him in the guts. Then turned to the perplexed Kenshin and speechless Kaoru. "Aa… I'm supposed to bring you back forward to the laboratory where I am from and bring you round for a tour of the modern facilities."  
  
  
  
No answer, except for the whimpers from sano, and blubbering of saliva from yahiko.  
  
  
  
She looked around, before adding sheepishly, "I don't think you got me. Never mind. Let's just say, I'm taking you to a one day holiday to the next world." Smiling sweetly, she waited for the response.  
  
  
  
"Another world?" Kenshin said, dizzy from all the information.  
  
  
  
"What world?" Kaoru said eagerly, warming up to this weird girl.  
  
  
  
"Blugh…"yahiko muttered.  
  
  
  
"Kuso…" sano whimpered.  
  
  
  
"A world where people are more advanced. Okay, to make it more simpler, I'll say that, you are going FORWARD in time to see what the future world is like in the 2001 year."  
  
  
  
Kenshin's eyes almost popped out of their sockets. Kaoru stood there wondering, eyes wistful. Yahiko sat up straight. Sano stopped mid-way rubbing his stomach.  
  
  
  
"Really…?" kaoru said wistfully. "I would like to go… demo… what will people say if we left the dojo suddenly?"  
  
  
  
"Ah, don't worry. Time will stop here while I bring you to the future world, that is, for you. But for me, it's my present world. And Kaoru, there's different kinds of chocolate invented too. Mint, white many!" she looked slyly at the drooling kaoru, and the growl echoing from Sano.  
  
  
  
"Well, it's that's the case, let's go!! I'm hungry." Yahiko complained. "And I'm going to get you for pounding me."  
  
  
  
"You've got no chance, Yahiko-chan. The security's way tight there, and laws are stricter. No spitting in public, no fights no brawls. Once there is, you'll be in jail till the trail."  
  
  
  
That seemed to please Kenshin a lot.  
  
  
  
"Well then. I agree to go. It seems like a safe place to go… and Kaoru-dono and minna-san would be safe." Kenshin finally spoke.  
  
  
  
"But. They'll be surprised to see you guys in traditional clothes when we go out… don't worry. I'll handle the problem." Then, without their consent, she started taking out a long measuring tape, and measured their shoulder width, leg width, and waistline.  
  
  
  
"Hey hey hey!!! What the HELL are you doing?" Sano yelped as the cool tape went round his waist.  
  
  
  
"Daijubou daijubou… I need your measurements…" she muttered, while keying down their measurements in the small device.  
  
  
  
After a while, with everyone flustered, she did something with the device, and then spoke into it. It went crackle, sputter, before a reply was heard.  
  
  
  
"Officer 197 reporting for duty. Your request was sent successfully. The clothes would be arriving soon."  
  
  
  
"Thank you, Officer 197. You may go." She spoke into it before clicking it shut.  
  
  
  
She looked up, and saw everyone staring at her scandalized, and kenshin drawing his sakabatou.  
  
  
  
"An enemy? I'll handle it." She spoke nonchalantly, before drawing a gun from her waist.  
  
  
  
"Ii..Iie… demo, time machine tester-dono… that thing you just spoke to… it's a ghost!!!" Sano said shakily, pointing a shaking finger at it.  
  
  
  
"Drop it, tester-dono. I'll destroy it for you." Kenshin said, while Kaoru and Yahiko hid behind his back.  
  
  
  
Laughing, she lifted it up. "It's a MORDERN thing. You don't understand. My people will explain it to you later on…"  
  
  
  
Suddenly…  
  
  
  
ZAP!  
  
  
  
A big bag dropped from the sky, and landed on Yahiko.  
  
  
  
"Oupmgh…" muttered the poor boy.  
  
  
  
"What's that?" kaoru said, prodding the blue material, bulging from all the clothes inside.  
  
  
  
"Ah. Our clothes arrived. Let's change!!!" she yelled gleefully, while opening the zipper and taking all the bundles out.  
  
  
  
"tester-dono… ano…"  
  
  
  
"Don't ask. Just take your clothes…" she snapped with mild irritation. The fun of explaining all the modern stuff to them worn out quickly. And was replaced with a bit of annoyance and irritation.  
  
  
  
"Aa. Arigato gonzaimasu." Said Kenshin, taking his clothes.  
  
  
  
"How the heck do we wear this stuff?" asked Sano, holding his own clothes up. Which is, a pair of khaki coloured jeans, a T-shirt and a long vest to go with it.  
  
  
  
"How do we…?" One by one asked, and she hurried from here to there, correcting them and explaining.  
  
  
  
Finally, they retreated into the rooms to change.  
  
  
  
Tester went in with kaoru to change. (Hey… she need to change, right? After standing in the sun with them for so long… ^^;;)  
  
  
  
"Tester-san…"  
  
  
  
"Hai?"  
  
  
  
"How do I wear this?" Kaoru said, holding up a piece of white cloth.  
  
  
  
  
  
"Oh, ano…" tester said, blushing a little, before teaching kaoru how to wear it, which is a little difficult.  
  
  
  
After that, both flushing slightly, they came out. Tester, in sleeveless shirt, and jeans, while Kaoru opted for white T-shirt and blue jeans. Like the training gi she usually wears, so it doesn't makes a difference.  
  
  
  
As for the boys, when they came out, all looked strange and uncomfortable in theirs.  
  
  
  
Kaoru turned her head and stifled a giggle as tester went round adjusting their clothing.  
  
  
  
"Ano… tester-dono… I feel strange in this…" Kenshin muttered, tugging his shirt that showed his slight muscles and built.  
  
  
  
"Don't worry… now link hands with me and I'll bring you back." Tester said absent-mindedly. "Sano and Yahiko my left, Kenshin and Kaoru on my right."  
  
  
  
They arranged according to her way, and with Yahiko bouncing about impatiently and Sano yawning, Kenshin and Kaoru in their own world, holding hands tightly, tester spoke in another language through the device.  
  
  
  
"Ready. Officer 726, prepare to launch. Thank you."  
  
  
  
Then she turned back.  
  
  
  
"Minna-san! It'll be activated in the countdown of three, two one, zerooooooooooo….!!!"  
  
  
  
"ORO!!! Kaoru-dono!!"  
  
  
  
"Eiieeeeeeeeeee!!!!!"  
  
--  
  
On to the next part….  
  
Saiki-san 


	2. Part II

Time Machine II  
  
"Eeiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!" Kaoru screamed.  
  
And in a flash of blinding white light, they appeared in a room full of metal and polished white walls.  
  
"Ano… where are we?" Yahiko groaned, rubbing his dizzy head.  
  
"Kenshin… Kenshin… daijubou?" Kaoru patted his back.  
  
"Orororororo…."  
  
"Chikuso… my life span is shortening because of you, tester-san…" sano grumbled while holding his head, standing up. "Tester-san?" he looked up, and saw her sprawled on the floor, spiral eyed, and with many male officers surrounding her, speaking to her in alien language.  
  
"Kuso!! Tester-san!!" Sano yelled standing up straight, preparing for his famed punch.  
  
"I'm all right…" she finally snapped out of it, speaking in english… before seeeing sano preparing for his punch.  
  
"Dame!!! Sano!! Watashi wa daijubou desu ka!!" she flung her arm around his arm. "Dame!! They're my friends!!"  
  
"Honto? Che… don't look like decent people…" sano lowered his hand and ran through his head.  
  
"Well, you don't look like on yourself…" tester muttered.  
  
"Nani?!"  
  
"Maa…maa…" Kenshin stood in between them, with Kaoru now attending to Yahiko.  
  
"Humphm… anyway…" she turned back to her officers, whom all treated her with respect, and saluted to her when she finished giving them instructions in gibbish language.  
  
Turning to the revived kenshin-gumi, she clapped her hands.  
  
"First stop, the park!!!" she said cheerfully. "Let's get into the car!!"  
  
"Car?!" Kaoru asked, while helping Yahiko up.  
  
"You'll see… c'mon!" and she ran towards a metal door which opened without her touching it.  
  
"Magic!" Yahiko whispered.  
  
"Hayaku!" She cried.  
  
"Hai!!!" and they ran after her.  
  
  
  
"I am NOT getting into this MONSTER!" Sano cried for the hundredth time.  
  
Tester started dragging him in it, and then pushing him in beside kenshin. "It's TOTALLY safe… unless you count driving with a lousy chauffeur… but this is one of the best, ne, Tom?  
  
"Aa." Said the man behind the wheel.  
  
"Sou desu ka… tester-dono…"  
  
"What's a park?" Kaoru asked as tester slid into the seat up front and slamming the door shut.  
  
"You'll see…" as she snapped the safety belt up. "And Sano… relax!"  
  
"HOW CAN I RELAX WHEN I'M INSIDE SOMETHING THAT IS DANGEROUS AND I CAN DO NOTHING TO IT?!" Sano bellowed from behind, clutching the handle tightly.  
  
"There is." Kenshin replied quietly.  
  
"What?"  
  
"I can knock you unconscious, or worse…" he said.  
  
And that shut Sano up.  
  
Throughout the journey, Yahiko banged on the glass windows while Kaoru and Kenshin gaped at the scenery before them. Tall skyscrapers and multiples of cars zooming past them, but also with some greenery to add. Sano? Well, he was praying non-stop.  
  
When they finally reached the park, Kaoru breathed.  
  
"It is so beautiful!!" she exclaimed, looking at the surroundings.  
  
"Aa…" Kenshin agreed.  
  
"You can look, Sano." Yahiko nudged the pale street fighter.  
  
And he instantly got out of the car.  
  
Tester got out, made arrangements with the driver, before annoucing to them.  
  
"I am going to teach all of you how to ride a bicycle. Wait here." And she trounced off to a nearby shop renting (at least to the kenshin-gumi) strange two wheel's things.  
  
Then, tester came back, struggling to push two two-rider bicycles and one single bicycle.  
  
"Ano… this is safe?" Kenshin prodded it.  
  
"It's okay once you know how to ride it…" tester slung her leg over the stump and rode on it with ease.  
  
"I'll test it to make sure it's safe for Kaoru-dono…" Then he imitated her style and rode on it.  
  
"Ganbatte! Kenshin!" Kaoru screamed from the sidelines.  
  
"Yeah Kenshin!" Yahiko yelled.  
  
"Kuso, kenshin… you're not scared?" Sano muttered, which earned him a nudge in his ribs from tester.  
  
"Kenshin, just keep the wheels of the cycle moving. It'll stop you from falling and the bicycle will go on moving." Tester called out.  
  
"That's it?" He called back. And within seconds, he literally flew round the park on the cycle.  
  
"Kenshin!!!"  
  
"Daijubou, daijubou… kaoru-don, it's safe, climb on to the back…" kenshin smiled.  
  
"Hai!!" and the both of them sped round.  
  
"That means, it leaves the both of you." Tester turned to the remaining two boys.  
  
"Alright! Sano, let's go!!" Yahiko said with child-like enthusiasm  
  
"Sumanu… I'm not feeling very well…." He edged backwards slowly.  
  
"Ah, don't be a coward, Sano… let's go!" And Yahiko dragged him towards the bike.  
  
"I'll treat you to a special lunch later on if you ride with Yahiko-kun!" she called.  
  
Sano perked up immediately. "Okay… let's boogie!!!" he said happily, clambering on and soon cycled behind Kenshin and Kaoru.  
  
Tesre joined them soon and went round the park a few times before all of their butts were sore.  
  
"That. Is soooo great!!" yahiko cried.  
  
"Fine. Now, for lunch?" sano looked expectingly at tester.  
  
"Soon." Tester said absently while looking at the mushy red-head and raven haired girl. "Anyway, guys! Tom is here!" And they boarded up the car and set off for the nearest food court, which, though sano complained the food was strange to eat and taste, burnt a hole in tester's pocket.  
  
And worse to come, when they entered a supermarket, Kaoru acted up a big fussed over which chocolate to purchase, and Sano looking for more food, eg. TV dinners, Yahiko looking hungrily at the beautiful sweets and wondering which Tsubame would like, and Kenshin scruntizing over packed up sushi and wasabi, and canned Japanese food. Tester was busy hiding herself from all the looks people gave the kenshin-gumi.  
  
"Are you done?" she asked from a dark corner.  
  
"Done!" Sano cried, carryiong a whole lot of chips and others in his arms.  
  
"Done!" Yahiko cried, clutching a bag a sushi like sweets.  
  
"Done!" Kaoru said, cluthcing several packets of chocolate.  
  
"Oro!! Sessha isn't done yet!! Sessha don't understand…" Kenshin still stood in front of those packets, deep in concentration.  
  
"Ah… Kenshin… you can cook any type of dishes for us back later… don't need these…" Sano gestured at the neatly packed stuff.  
  
"Aa, you're right. Let's go…"Kenshin nodded. Taking one final look at the shelves, he followed tester who was up front grumbling.  
  
Finally, she paid for everything, and went off to the car, the boot filled up mostly with Sano's stuff.  
  
"Sano, you only cared about FOOD…" tester grumbled. "I'm GLAD that you're going back…" True, the day's going to end, and thus, their visit is going to end.  
  
"Che, tester… can't you see I need food to fill my immense stomach?" sano grunted.  
  
"Hai hai… Tom? Back to the lab please." She told the driver. He nodded silently, and sped off.  
  
Arriving at the lab, tester told them. "Well, our visit ends here… hope you all have a good time… and it's a good thing you didn't bring your sakabatou along, kenshin… we'll surely get into trouble if you bring that…"  
  
"I figured, tester-dono…"  
  
"Ano, kenshin, you want one?" Kaoru offered him a chocolate.  
  
"Arigato…" their hands brushed, they flushed, and stood there, lost in their world again.  
  
"Humph… but I'm glad I can get those two together…" tester looked at them wistfully.  
  
"Hey… guess you won't have anything to keep as a sovenier of our arrival… here…" Sano said gruffly. Putting down his stuff, he untied his head band and gave it to her.  
  
"Honto ni?" tester said softly, her fingers playing on the ends. "Arigato…" and tied it on her forehead.  
  
Sano looked away, but apparently pleased with himself.  
  
"You too, Yahiko-kun… you must tell your Tsubame about it, ne?" tester ruffled his hair.  
  
"Tester!!" Yahiko growled, blushing. "Not MY Tsubame! She's not mine!!"  
  
"Hai… hai… in a few years' it will…" tester smiled wickedly, recovering from her sadness.  
  
"TESTER!!!" Yahiko bounced up with his bokken ready, but was punched to the ground by tester.  
  
"Heh. Work on your temper when you get back." Tester said, then turn suddenly to Sano. "You too. Get a new headband and tell Megumi about it, ne?"  
  
"I will." Sano replied.  
  
"Kenshin? Kaoru? Ready to go?" she asked the couple.  
  
"Hai!"  
  
"Okay."  
  
Tester took the device from an officer, and then pointed at them.  
  
"Sayonara! I really had a good time!!"  
  
"Us too, tester-san…"  
  
"Iie.. throughout, I'd never told you my real name. Please remember it! I am kyoko saiki, please remember!!" she called, her eyes misting up. "And take your new future clothes as a memory of me!!"  
  
"We will, now let's get going. I'm hungry." Sano called, rubbing his stomach.  
  
"Bye!!" Kaoru asid, but not before giving tester, no, kyoko a bone crushing hug. She whispered into kyoko's ear. "Arigato, saiki-san, for giving Kenshin and me get together…"  
  
"My pleasure, Kaoru…" and returned her hug.  
  
Then, they huddled together, and click! The device went off, and they were back at the kamiya dojo, where kenshin landed near the well beside the laundry, Kaoru and Yahiko in the dojo, while Sano on the porch.  
  
"We defintely had a good time, ne?"  
  
"Hai…"  
  
~*Owari*~  
  
--  
  
I will give credit to those who beta read for me… ^.^ anyway, how it is? R and R pelase!  
  
Saiki-san 


End file.
